Foolish Beat

My first blog….

I haven’t had the mood to write. Yes, what a lame excuse.

It’s already March.

Had been wanting to write for a long time. Admitedly, I had been lazy but yet deep inside me , I have the inner calling to write, to muse about things and to share. And so I decided not to be laid back and started to write.

First of all, let me retrace back to December’2006 for a good memorable reason.

A month of confused emotions, a time of the year where I tend to reflect a lot, a gay month to celebrate Yuletide and for a tense moment, it was a time where I ponder a lot of my future. It’s a period in the calendar where the creeping annoyance to prepare for another year, bidding goodbye to my personal fruitful 2006 and the tendencies of reflecting on the past one year achievements and disappointments with joy and regrets.

Celebrated Christmas 2006 with my beloved family members in awesome Penang. It was a decision I made in October. Wanting to spend Christmas outside KL because the ever growing busy city reminded me a lot of work. I want to leave the serious stuff for a while and have a good holiday with close family members. MY JB friends was a bit irritated that I will not be presence at the gathering for the exchange of presents which had became an annual thing. I assured them that my presents will be under their christmas tree nevertheless and my thought will be with them on that special day. that convinced them well. Had always spending christmas in JB for the past 5 years. this time i was determined to celebrate in a different place and to be away from too familiar environment.

Never been to the Pearl Of Orient since 1999, was there for the first time and it barely leave a good impressions. It was a family gathering, we did nothing but the usual feasting on Penang food and the usual opening of presents. I was not awe by the island for reasons unknown to me back then although I had been to all the attractive tourist sites. This time though, six year later, being in Penang with the same beloved families for 4 good days. Landed in Penang airport and my cousin picked me up. Along the way, I was a bit surprised of how beautiful the island is,something obvious that I haven’t been notice in 1999. I sense a different Penang. For the first time, was awed by it, entranced by the beautiful colonial buidings of shoplots and mansions.Always a history lover and for that I have a silent prayer in my heart that those historical old buidings will be maintained for posterity.

Northam Hotel offered a nice view of the sea and since I had been always attracted to beaches and sea, the picture was a perfect setting to calm my sore brain and body in a psychological motions, and yes, it’s a simple holiday setting which was mysteriously heaven sent!. Penang food was yummy and I had ate greedily until my cousin was teasing me, cause I kept saying to him that I was hungry and been craving for food from morning to night. The salivating fish steamboat, the best Roti Canai I had eaten in my life and the wholesome porridge. Another attraction was the route to the famous Ferengghi Beach which was breathtaking.

Then, yours truly came back to KL and trying to get tune with myself of the wonderful feelings that I had when I was in Penang. Was I being intoxicated with emotions or am I changed to become more appreciative of small things around me?. Or in a more realistic manner, maybe I was so exhausted at work and winding up in sunny windy Penang Island filled with lots of laughter from love ones was seem to be a perfect gateway.

And in another aspect, it’s another year of not hearing from him. He had been long gone from the earth, and the memories still preceded in my life. Yet, I don’t miss him anymore except that he only haunts me on December. There was a promise to be fulfilled by him on Christmas day, but alas, he voiced out a promise he had never able to keep. A promise that never cease to warn me of his beautiful existence at this time of the year. A fun filled trip like that lessen the heartbreak of the broken promise. It will be another 11 months before the jingle christmas carols transported me to the day in Avon Day coffee house in JB when he looked at me with his sincere eyes and said `I promise’. Oh no!, Dear God , I really want to move on

Anyway, slowly 2007 is within my grasp. I want to embrace it with mild trepidation. Yeah…..

~ by foolishbeat on March 11, 2007.